Step Seven

"Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings"

The 12x12 goes on extensively about the humility involved in this step. It talks about how many of us don't even have a passing acquaintance with humility. It talks about how the word itself has a lot of negative connotations.

I don't have a problem with humility -- I'm the most humble person I know!

But seriously, many people do seem to have a problem with it in today's society. Our egos seem to be blown way out of proportion because people have made oh so many technological advancements in the past century. It's not necessarily a good thing either. Many of those same people are miserable. We really don't give God/dess enough credit for teaching us how to do all this stuff! It is definitely not humble to assume we created all this stuff by our lonesome and on our limited intelligence. On some level, we know it isn't true. The truth will set us free.... Until we accept the truth we will be kept in our prison of misery.

It wasn't all done in good faith and with good intentions, either. Child labor was a big part of the industrial revolution.

To be humble is to accept that we are worthy of God/dess' love just as we are -- warts and all. To be humble is to accept that God/dess are above us and it's precisely that unconditional love that places God/dess above each of us. We are all equals. People aren't really above each other.. I've heard it said that alcoholics and addicts are the only people who can lay in the gutter and look down upon others. Humility is thinking of ourselves less and thinking more of others. Humility is an honest appraisal of who we are. Humility and beating oneself up are not the same thing either. Thinking we are pieces of crap who deserve the worst is NOT humility. We are still thinking of ourselves too much when we think this way.

True humility frees us from the unnecessary burden of carrying the world upon our shoulders.

It is often said in AA and NA, "keep your side of the street clean." That is a much smaller burden then the whole world. We cannot make others do anything. A humble person realizes that s/he has just no control over others. True -- if only others would do their part -- the world would be a much better place. But, we can and must do our part. That is all we can truly do to make the world a better place.

True humility starts with the admission of powerlessness and unmanagability. Humility is about facts and it is a fact we have no control over our drinking and/or using once we start. We learn about humility just accepting that fact.

It can be quite a relief to actually find out we can put the world back on God/dess' shoulders. We can even give many of our burdens to Him or Her, too! God/dess will help us if we only ask -- and often S/He will help us even if we don't ask. It's hard to find real peace and happiness without humility. It can be such a relief to say "this is not my responsibility!"

I have a hard time picturing anyone being able to ask God/dess to remove defects without being humble about it. To just do it -- cross this bridge when one comes to it -- is a step in the right direction.

It says in the 12x12, "The chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear -- primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded," p 76.

This tells me that the golden rule is good here. How much do we, ourselves, want to meet other people's demands!? If we can accept that others (including God/dess) deserve to be treated with the respect we ourselves deserve, we have definitely become more humble. Obviously humility is not a lack of self respect, but a healthy self respect!

"The seventh step is where we make the change in our attitude which permits us, with humility as our guide, to move out from ourselves toward others and toward God," 12x12 p. 76

That to me means I will only see the love I need if I am humble enough to see it. We all need love. To be humble means we can give and receive love in a healthy way -- and that is a good thing!